Plan B Enthusiast T-Shirts

The missiles had failed....so it was down to Frank....and plan B.

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

Airlines

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

'We are entering an era of thrift, so in place of champagne and canapes, there will be a jumble sale.'

Deadline

'Let's go home and come back next year. It's Ground Hog Deficit!'

DIY marriage counseling.

'They never quite finished it - it was probably over budget.'

"Damn Pope Gregory and his new calendar."

The spend is high

'I'm afraid it's gingivitis.'

Child has practiced building sand castles in snow.

"Tell me again how many young minds I will have shaped by the end of my teaching career."

10 commandments

'Dang, it looks like they have found out about my plan to take over the world...'

"I don't mind car chases as long as they're car chases about something."

"I'm afraid your allowance didn't survive the latest round of budget cuts."

Family planning - 'I was thinking something low maintenance.'

"You do not have a QR-Code."

Hippie on the moon

“I’ve got an idea for a story: Gus and Ethel live on Long Island, on the North Shore. He works sixteen hours a day writing fiction. Ethel never goes out, never does anything except fix Gus sandwiches and in the end she becomes a nympho-lesbo-killer-whore. Here’s your sandwich”

"I proclaim this sun-drenched tropical country a new tourist mecca, in the names of Consolidated Airways and the Peck & Smathers Advertising and Public Relations Company."

"We thought we could put in the details later."

"Could you hold off clipping your coupons until I've finished reading the paper?"

bird

"My schedule is just nuts."

Bev puts on an old favorite

I warned you to keep it low!

"Someone's screwed up. . . there's apiece of road here no-one's working on!"

"We love your manuscript! It's exactly the sort of big, sprawling epic we've been looking for!"

"We need a plot twist."

How to make sure he won't see his shadow.

"But if we didn't measure things we wouldn't know how good we were at measuring the things that we're measuring!"

He Didn't Know How To Appreciate Nature