Physical Health Pillows

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

2021

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"Good For You / Bad For You"

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

"Do you guys serve beer?"

'Okay, ladies! We're not just going to burn those calories, we're going to drown them!'

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

What the Doctor Ordered

Woman and pets with hair sticking straight up all enter Stress Management Clinic.

'Well, well, well...'

Lactose Intolerant

"Your contents have shifted."

Mister Mid-Life Crisis

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

PSA Banter.

Doctor pulling golf caddy sees patient pulling oxygen caddy.

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

'Not that sort of body building program!'

Bad for you but to die for

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."