Phone Etiquette Enthusiast T-Shirts

A recent study found frequent use of cell phones can present a serious health risk to the incredibly inconsiderate.

"Hello? is it me you're looking for?"

"Must you look at your phone when I'm talking to you?"

"I can't talk now - he's right here."

I can't believe it's come to his. I'll be glad to give you candy when you're off your cell phone.

"Excuse me - I'm trying to have private conversation here!"

'A man's ringtone says a lot about him.'

"It's a bit awkward at the moment, can I ring you back?"

"I'm suffering the unbearable loneliness of being right on the internet."

'I realize this is your first sales call, young man, but 15 minutes is way too long to shake hands.'

That's a good question, Ossie... may I call you 'Ossie', Ossie?

'Oh...the IRS called. Something about an audit. I told them we weren't interested.'

"Who on earth would call on a landline? How rude!"

"Are you busy or are you at work?"

"I'm not repeating the specials again until everyone puts down their phones."

'I can't talk... I'm in the quiet carriage.' - '3...2...1...' - 'What? I can't hear you... you're breaking up...' - 'Brace! Brace!' - 'I said 'I'm in the quiet carriage'!!!' - 'Irony crash.'

"Donald, you’re in the C-suite now. No more smiley faces or exclamation points."

"Dave's away from his desk, I'm afraid. Can I take a message, or read you his browser history."

First Church: Sunday's Topic - Thou Shalt Not Blog Against Thy Neighbour.'

'Hah, he bowed lower than I did.'

How Dogs Identify Themselves in Upscale Neighborhoods.

'I told you never to Facebook, Bebo, Hotmail, Yahoo, MSN or phone me at work...'

Would it be rude if I didn't follow them all back?

"He came out from behind his desk. We got 'em."

Trolling on social media

"Before you go through the gates of heaven think back to the early days of the internet. Did you ever visit or post anything homophobic, racist or sexist? Tell me now or I will find out."

"That time you realized your hashtags were longer than your message. #irony #wow #epiphany #wakeupCall #lesson #stopthat #omg #thwarted #notgood #somethingsWrongHere #spiritual-awakening #myword #ohlawdy #wthigh #seriously? #wontSome-bodyThink-of-The-Children?" "ERROR: You have exceeded the number of characters allowed." "That time you. #irony #wow #epiphany #wakeupCall #lesson #stopthat #omg #thwarted #notgood #somethings-WrongHere #spiritualawakening #myword #ohlawdy #wthigh #seriously? #

Yes, I'm sitting down, Sally

"Anderson, Anderson and Andersons - Stephens speaking."

'Twitter or tweet-free?'

'You're a telemarketer? Good. I've always wanted to telemarketer off!'

"If it's important they'll call back."

Thank you for holding...

'Should have shook hands...' - 'Should have bowed...' - 'Should have read the keynote...'

The Fürther Adventures of the Phone Führer