Phone Conversations Gifts

"Just sitting here widening. You?"

Time management office worker

"Oh, nothing too exciting, Donna. I burned the toast last Wednesday, and on Saturday Jim split an infinitive. What's new with you?"

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

'I'm sorry, Mr. President, he can't come to the phone right now...he's doing that crazy hand jive.'

'Great! To top it all off, I've been put on hold!'

"I'm just the office boy Sir Elton, and have no idea how the leak happened - so there's no point in giving me a rocket, man!"

"I'm running late—some people were waiting for my table so I had to take my sweet time."

"Can you hold a moment? I've asked you before not to donate my organs till after I'm dead."

'I'll be late for dinner - a shelf fell on me.'

'I'll talk louder...' (speech bubble smothering other people in the cartoon).

'Thank you for calling the Attention Deficit Disorder Hotline... Please continue to hold.'

'Sorry, Tarquin can't come to the phone right now...'

'Hello, is that the government? Yes, I was just wondering... is the lambada still forbidden?'

"We are experiencing high call volume. Please do not hold."

Lance, I said if it's for me, I'm not here. It's not for you, it's for me. I'm not here, either.

Hang on, Bill. I have another call…Alayna, how many times have I told you not to interrupt me while I'm on the phone? Blue lake.

! I think I try too hard with women, Axel. For instance, when I call then on the phone, I use tic tacs.

Whoever told you you should wait three days before calling a number you got from a woman in a bar was mistaken. You should wait three years.

"Mom! You and dad won't believe this, but right now I'm watching two flies making out on top of a can of soda!!" Dan was really lonely.

"Yes, Mother. This is a ‘good time’ to discuss your hip replacement."

"Yes, Mother ... I'm still single."

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

"Yes, I'm alone."

'A representative will be with you in twelve minutes... so, if you have to go to the bathroom, please go now...'

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

'Hello, Pastor Parker here. Thank you for calling moral support. Your call may be monitored to ... '

"I'm upstairs right now. On weekends and holidays, I go downstairs."

Phone solicitors like customers who are afraid to hang up.

A senior moment.

'Hey Joe!...Me? Oh,nothing much,just out walking the fish.And you?...'

'I'd love you to come round, Samantha - but I'm sipping my cocoa all ready for sleepy bo-bos.'

'Hello. Law offices of Anderson, Avery, Baer, Barton, Baston, Caggly, Cooper ... drat, who comes after Cooper?'

'I'm on my break, Sam... I'll call you back when I start work.'

'... Press 7 to admit defeat...'