Phone Chats T-Shirts

"Not much - just flushing out my arteries."

'A representative will be with you in twelve minutes... so, if you have to go to the bathroom, please go now...'

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

"At least their bull sessions are green. Everything they say is 100% biodegradable."

"I'm upstairs right now. On weekends and holidays, I go downstairs."

Phone solicitors like customers who are afraid to hang up.

Time management office worker

A senior moment.

'Hey Joe!...Me? Oh,nothing much,just out walking the fish.And you?...'

'I'm sorry, Mr. President, he can't come to the phone right now...he's doing that crazy hand jive.'

'I'd love you to come round, Samantha - but I'm sipping my cocoa all ready for sleepy bo-bos.'

"Just sitting here widening. You?"

'I'll be late for dinner - a shelf fell on me.'

Hot Line

'Jenny can't come to the phone, she's naked. Only joking, mate. Wrong number.'

'Are you in here tonight?'

'From the Mouth of Arthur Baskin.'

'I'm about to have a tantrum. What are you doing?'

'Can't you tell people about our new swimming pool without saying I've 'gone off the deep end?''

'Thank you for calling the bullpen,,, To continue in English, Press one,,,'

"Can you hold a moment? I've asked you before not to donate my organs till after I'm dead."

"I was like 'OMG,' and she was all 'No way', and I was like 'Yes, way', and she was...uh-oh, gotta run."

"I'd love to talk. I'm on a train!"

"Her ladyship isn't in—wait, yes, no—so sorry, she's out."

Well look, I'm afraid I really must run...

"No problem, B. J. I can talk and baste at the same time."

Heaven on the Phone to Hell - 'We've got Sky.'

'Sorry but my disposable income is tied up in a roast in the oven.'

New Space Shuttle Mission: Deployment of the First Orbiting Telemarketer

'Hi mom! How are you? I'm very well! How is dad? Hi mom...' 'Damned parrots...'

'This is Jake. I'm not in now, so please leave a message...HELLO! HELLO! This is Jake! Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm just mesin' with you! I'm still NOT in!'

"I've been talking on this phone so much, I'm getting cauliflower ears."

'I've got to go - we're having the zebras for dinner.'

"Fruit salad? Count me in!"