Pharmaceutical Rep Pillows

'Woke you out of a sound sleep, Mr Bear? for only $22.50 these little bombers will put you back under till spring.'

'I'm going to prescribe a new diabetic medication. It's a bit costly. I'll start you off with fifty dollars a week.'

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

Company sales forecast mirrors the weather

"Your expense account ain't what it used to be. There's not enough money on your card to cover the $5.35."

Perks Featured in Vacancy at Toy Company

Covid Variants

"How long before the clinical trials are over?"

"You only need one prescription. The other 7 are for the side effects."

"We're all in the same boat, except it's more like a life raft than an actual boat."

"You're never home."

"Phil's an expert networker. One drink and he's on schmooze-control."

Medical Equipment profit chart.

'Those are all highway miles. The previous owner was a pharmaceutical sales rep.'

Brick Salesman

'I knew I shouldn't have shown a pie chart so close to lunch.'

'Trevor was the first rep at the office to have a portable computer.'

"Did you speak to our client in Australia?"

Corporate Darwinism

"Am I passionate about fashion? Yep, I guess you could say I'm fashionate."

"...but do not take Clynkovix if you are already taking any other drug with a ridiculous name."

'Good to know my whole social life hasn't been a complete waste.'

'I'm not authorized to talk about that...I'll have to patch you through to our department of unspeakable evil.'

These Sales Reps get more aggressive every year.

'In a bizarre set of circumstances, the book salesman never showed up, but a drug rep is here with samples of Prozac.'

We at pharmacorp are 100% behind the benefits of spiritual and artistic therapies which is why we've developed 'megazymol' to enhance the experience!

"That's too big a pill for me to swallow, Harold!"

'Your prescription is ready. How would you like to finance it?'

'The cow that jumped over the moon, was she on some kind of growth hormones?'

Pets: This animal has not been tested on products.

"Our problem is we upgraded everything in the new version except the hype."

"For the perfect sedative, take the juice from a bottle of whisky..."