Pet Tech Tinkerer T-Shirts

'I don't need to keep him on a lead any more - he's electronically tagged.'

Pounding speeds up the computer.

Robot Parts $5

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

The Computer Bore

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

'Hey Harry, you know you've been walking around with a biscuit on your nose for the last two hours?'

'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

Needed Inventions: An Airbag To Protect The Viewer Against A Really Lousy Program.

Drool Marks

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

Early cyborg.

The Not-So Smart Meter

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

Gadget geek.

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

'I think I see what's making your funny noise.'

"We do all those old tricks electronically now."

Bicycle sat nav.

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

"The man who invented autocorrect died from the corona vibrator."

'I'm no expert, but I think we're a little behind when it comes to the latest industry technology.'

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

"No, it's not a bug. Since you keep losing you phone, I purchased you a phone-locating drone."

Fixing the Computer.