Pet Paramour Pillows

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

"What's wrong, boy? Is Timmy stuck in the well? Are zombies at your doggy door? A fire? Squirrels are holding your bone hostage? My Spotify stock just tanked?..." "He thinks he's real funny."

'Yessir, Ben us fly fisherman answer to a higher calling.'

"When I first arrived, Young Master was always with me and Old Master didn't want anything to do with me, nor it's the opposite: Go figure..."

"Yup, pretty sure that was a flying squirrel."

"You can stop pulling, you knucklehead—I took your leash off ten minutes ago."

'Marm doesn't understand, 'I've got it, I've got it'.'

"Odd, since neither of us overfeeds her by even the smallest amount."

Snooze buttons for cat owners

"Sitting here with you each day at sunset reminds me I have to get a job."

"C'mon. Get out there and go tinkle already."

"Let me know if you smell any large-mouth bass."

This is Giselle, our bichon frise, and Fred, our legacy pet.""This is Giselle, our bichon frise, and Fred, our legacy pet."

"Graham loved his creature comforts."

"I know, boy—I miss the smoked salmon at Zabar's, too."

'Dog Show' 'Worst breath winner'

'They used to call me 'Fluffy', but it's been 'Lucky' ever since I survived the spin cycle.'

'Have you seen little Spotty?'

Man's best friend - Man's worst friend - Man's only friend.

"He says he can quit anytime, but I'm starting to worry."

'My wife doesn't understand us.'

"Thanks for walking me home."

"Bailey! What part of 'never jump on the Stickley' don't you understand?!"

His master's voice

'Well, would ya look at this, Martha? The dog's stealin' our cable. I told you this breed can't be trusted.'

"Sitting here with you is so perfect … which reminds me: You can never die."

"Miss Sadie did remember several pets in her will."

Be a friend.

'She's killing me with kindness!'

Cat Chores

Cat watching 'Catsablanca'

'The waitress gave us a weird look. On the way back, I'd better drive and you can stick your head out the window.'