Pet Breeder T-Shirts

"... $3 million, I have $3 million. Can I get $4 million? Yes, $4 million ..."

'I see your problem. This is not an infertile pair. They're two males.'

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

"Wow. . . what's that?!"

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

Foster failure

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

He acts all cool and feral until the can of food comes out. Jingle jingle jingle.

'What has twelve legs and barks?'

Collies Without Borders

'Well, they're just great for running down gazelles and jackals!'

"He's my school project for science class."

'Another blond hair! You've been making a lot of night calls lately...'

Kultural K9's.

'Do you have anything a little longer in the leg ?'

"His father came from a family of climbers."

Fred and Nancy believed that their mutual love of a good sale would be enough to overcome 'the species issue'... but they were wrong.

'Boy, am I going to be pleased when the pregnancy is over...'

Puppies

"You are going to have lots of puppies."

'Sorry Ben, I never noticed the baby-sitting clause in the stud contract.'

Man lets his pigeons out to be fed in the park.

'It's a bloody-cross-breed.'

Good, but not Great Danes.

"Congratulations. It's a litter."

"I'm sixty three in human years and the mother of octuplets. Again."

'He's an octopussy. They're specially bred to catch over 100 mice an hour.'

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

"MOUSE FLAVORED CAT FOOD"

'I understand you don't have a resume but you do have your pedigree papers?'

'He's a very superior dog. Even his fleas have pedigrees!'

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

"You've got to understand, in my family Dad was the poodle and Mom was the pit bull."