Pessimist Chucklers Mugs

Forlornaments: Tools to drain individual and team spirit

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

'Satchel, life is like a can of tuna...'

"Our cat is the only god this home needs."

'I make certain all my clients are pessimists...they don't expect to win.'

Tom's last day.

The End is Near art gallery opening.

"I see fleeting moments of happiness in between extended periods of boredom and stress."

Lent is a real drag this year. - 'Why? What did you give up?' - 'Hope.' - 'I gave up chocolate. Guess what?1' - 'What?' - 'I've made my ideal weight! Yay!'

'Barnhill from Marketing will present our economic projections.'

Half Empty/Half Full/I'm Still On Vacation!!!

'Have you seen the financial pages?' - 'Yes, things are going to get a lot worse before the get worse.'

Abstract art proves that things can be as bad as they look.

"Sometimes, on days like this, I feel like the world is conspiring to make me happy."

This will be a banner day for you!

Doomsdayers recycle pamphlets in case they are wrong.

"Look, a shooting star- let's critique it!"

"If at first you don't succeed blame somebody."

'Look at that lunatic...'

A giant squid gets "Life Sucks" tattooed on its tentacles.

"Is this worse? Or is this worse?"

"This feels like the start of something that will eventually break one of our hearts."

"The nice thing about being a fruit fly is you only have to listen to one news cycle."

"First they make you button your own shirt, then they make you tie your own shoes...you gotta ask yourself ? where's this all heading?"

'Do we have to go through this every year Henman says he can win Wimbledon?'

'Alimony is like having to pay instalments on a car after you have written it off!'

"There's only one of them roaming around now. The others are in self-isolation."

'The bad news is the price of gas is going up. The good news is since I lost my job I've got nowhere to go anyway.'

"You really don't need a good life, just a great obituary writer."