Persistence Guru Gifts

'You need to be more persistent. Now, get out of here and keep coming back until you've worn me down.'

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

"A dozen eggs and a pint of semi-skimmed...Sorry, looks like I left my presentation in my other coat."

If nobody had invented graphics

"Why do they call it rush hour when no one goes anywhere?"

'Now I know why the strategy guide warned against entering the 5th stage. Awesome!'

The number one injury in today's workplace: severe bends caused by repeated exposure to deep-dive presentations.

Motivation to work

You've read the book's dust jacket. Now, play the video game!

"COUGH! COUGH! Years of data mining have left me with data lung. Don't be like your old man - go into modeling or visualization!"

'No, Timmy, we are not supposed to connect them.'

"Remind me again, is it Accounting or IT that handles issues related to online solitaire?"

All of our representatives are busy right now. Stay on the line and someone will be with you in a few miles.

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

Robotics. He's programmed to play video games all day long. Planned adolescence!

Computer games

"No, son, you’re not ‘M for Mature.’"

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

"Meanwhile, obsessing about productivity is way up."

"Don't worry, darling. You'll happen."

"Has anyone else noticed that the efficiency experts seem a little robotic?"

"Are we done yet? ... Because I'm turning around now."

"Post Covid it was clear that the old 9-5 was no longer viable, our industry lends itself to home working."

What an afternoon. Rudy, listen to me. It didn't mean anything. You can't play Xbox 360 all afternoon with a guy and pretend it means nothing. I was drunk! You loved it - all of it. The racing and arcade games, the first-person shooters, but especially ... No ... WWF Wrestling Smackdown. I'm a married woman!

Crane Game. Ball Game.

Test your patience, back in one hour.

'I caught him watching tv, surfing the net, and playing video games ..book him!'

"You should be able to get through your emails during the working day then you could use the rest of your life to do some of the work."