Perpetual Dater Mugs

Trapped in the worst blind date of his life, John Glynn tries to chew his arm off at the shoulder.

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

'Of course I'm on the pull - I'm a cricketer.'

Online Dating

'Of all the women who responded to my dating profile, you had the best emoticon.'

Kissable Frogs in Your Area

Sally and Doug had met online and were proving to be very compatible...

'I was attracted to you but your online photo, but now that I've seen you in High-Def...'

"The last time I was in Europe was 4 boyfriends ago..."

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

"That guy I just met is already texting me pictures of his plumage."

'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'

"Don't take this the wrong way, Howard, but I'd like to go back to having an on-line relationship."

'Take this stick-drive and open the file 'John's Emotional Baggage'. It'll save a lot of time.'

"I thought you did a great job with your gender neutral statements ... There will be a second date."

"Romeo,Romeo. Are you online,Romeo"

"This isn't working. We have nothing in common."

Financially Secure Romantic with sufficient fire in belly seeks damsel in distress...

We met online.

'That must be my computer date.'

'Let's do lunch.'

Single men in Tahiti

"What do you mean asking you to marry me via text wasn't romantic? Did you see the emoji with hearts for eyes I attached?"

"We couldn't connect. He kept spouting technobabble, and I, of course, kept coming back with psychobabble."

"I've become so good at dating—relationships that used to take months now last a matter of days."

'We met online.'

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

Cyber Love