Performance Supporter Mugs

"I set a limit: one pity play per actor friend per year."

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

"Just be yourself."

Comedy Cafe

Senta jumps into the sea

Theatre Crowd

'She sounds like your mother when you told her that you were going to marry me.'

Saxophone Player.

'Not even close man - easy listening's around the corner.'

See, Catty-O? I told you dinner was included with admission.

"I can neither confirm nor deny what this next song is about."

Ta Da!...

'Theaters from Hell' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

Suddenly, Becky noticed something which gave her pause.

'You're thinking of your wife again, aren't you?'

Don't put your daughter on the stage Mrs Worthington.

'He's a cheat I tell you - it's just a trick!'

Fire starts at magic show while audience participant is left behind.

'I told you I'd make you a star.'

"Returns"

'He's is in a bad mood tonight!'

Please consider donating your cancelled ticket so that we may sing again for you very soon.

"Music has doubled my income..."

"Tonight Mathew, I'm going to be, Charlotte Church"

"This isn't what I had in mind. . ."

'The problem isn't your high definition television, it's your low definition eyes.'

Simultaneous translation.

Ballerina and the light switch.

"Instead of a three-hour play with 20 performers, what about a single performer, alone onstage, telling jokes for 30 minutes?"

"The circus' new owner hired a catcher for us."

"I'm sorry, he's just left the stage. May I take a message?"

' It's really boring since they agreed to power sharing.'

"Do you want my opinion as an art critic or as your best friend?"

One woman show