Pencil Humourist Mugs

The Cartoonists

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

'Okay, is there anybody else whose homework ate their dog?'

A tortoise toboggans down a hill in its shell

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

Don't swallow. I've lost a contact.

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"Walk, hell- I gotta dance."

'But you know I don't have brand loyalty for anyone but you!'

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

"I don't know what else we can do. He won't look up from the screen!"

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

"Do you see that inexplicably beautiful hydrangea over there?… Nature calls."

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"

Barbeque Casualty.

Glance Exchange

"The Eggsorcist"

"Someone throw him a punchline!"

Fiscal cliff - US dollar falling over the edge.

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

"As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from restless dreams, transformed into a monstrous vermin, he thought to himself: never again bourbon and tequila in the same night, and this time, I mean it."

Competitive Eating Competition Competitive Vomiting Competition,

STRIP God' s dog urinating on planet Earth

"Now there's something you don't see everyday. How long have you been using dachshunds as sled dogs.?"

"It's just a tree."

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

"How about a hand."

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

'You can't come in here with that.'

Snowman ice fishing.