Past Life Regression Mugs

'You will be reincarnated as someone who undergoes past life regression.'

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

Crap from the future.

'Mom, Dad... we found out that in a previous life, Sheila was a dog and I was a tree. That's why we decided to marry to continue this promising relationship!'

'The stage hypnotist was great, he regressed Jeff to a previous life, and discovered that he was a layabout then, too.'

"I get the strange feeling this has happened before."

Modern Life Blues

"Why does it always have to represent something?"

"In my previous life I was arugula."

"I'm having trouble with my long-term memory -- I can't remember my earlier reincarnations."

"Very funny."

Door sign states: Reincarnation studies Come again ... and again.

"That was a fascinating regression. Apparently, you were a pirate in a previous life!"

'My whole life flashed before my eyes. I want to talk to the guy who did the editing.'

"Remember the night in the Tetons when we smoked so much weed we thought we were hallucinating?"

Think we knew each other in a past life, Randy? I don't believe in past lives. In fact, I don't believe in the past. Or the future I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight? ... Sorry, that's Randy's line #42. Reflex. Wait, let me write that down.

Two ATMs sit side by side; one is labeled "Cash" while the other is labeled "Power".

"I'm sorry, Mister Mulligan is dead. . . would you care to wait?"

Man looking at a vending machine with a hand sticking out of it and a sign that reads "Put'er there buddy".

'It all started in my previous life, doctor.'

"My psychic tells me I was a glass of water in a previous life."

Street sign: 'Life gets even more complicated here to corner.'

'You were a boring accountant in ten previous lives.'

'Apparently I was wrong about you being Elvis in a past life.. It turns out you were an Elvis impersonator.'

"He looks so natural."

Eggs That Were Anagarms In Past Lives -'Unscramble Me'.

'Remember this test, Ms. Hart? Nineteen ninety. Multiple choice. You asked which of these is not a planet, and I checked Pluto...'

'What's my Dad buying me for my Birthday?'

"We believe that in a former life she was an editor."

"Luckily, our retirement funds are entirely in double lattes."

'Ready for your first lesson in negotiations?'

Retiring from the rat race

"Are you ready to rock within your means so as not to lose sight of what’s really important?"

Vending machine offers tea and sympathy

"I can see that in your past life you were also a gullible schmo easily taken in by charlatans."