Passive Observer T-Shirts

"Ed's not really into binge watching...he just can't find the remote."

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

"Hey! Where's that black cat? My ride's ready!"

"Geez, from way up here it almost looks like there’s hope for humanity."

'Anorak anoraks'.

"He doesn’t say much, but he thinks a lot."

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

Sports Fan - Whoever's Winning

"Of course I attend the meetings but I'm more of a lurker,"

The point in every relationship, when annoying habits become intolerable...

Chess on TV

Fortunes. Tarot. Palms. You punched the fortune teller just because he was smiling? I always wanted to strike a happy medium.

"You will not gain any sympathy from this court by offering to give one-tenth of your haul to the Church."

"I just realized that unless I'm riding for some cause, I must look like an idiot."

The whole ambience of the research trip was ruined by Harold's squeaky boots!

"Everyone is so cynical these days."

"Don't look now, but in 3 seconds I want you to very nonchalantly look at my tail and tell me if it's wagging."

'It's quiet... Too quiet.'

"Frankly, I could move a lot faster, but the truth is that I lack motivation..."

This week we've explored what might happen if there were a military draft. Hear what I say: How many soldiers died today? Now back to our regular programming. My iPad's shiny. My oil stocks are soaring.

'I simply don't know what I'd do with mother, if it wasn't for the squatters!'

"Trust me, this place is worth the wait."

'Watching the football.'

Hello- I'm a Wreck.

"A movie? I would rather watch this!"

It was a tough case. Plenty of witnesses, but no one was talking.

Introvert Career Faire.

"Just as your family means a lot to you, Henderson, power means a lot to me.

'I've just discovered that the only loop I'm in, is the one I just got thrown for...'

Tarot Lying

"Oh, don't mind him. He comes here to get warmed over."

"You have an anti-addiction...everyone just hates you!"

"You wouldn't understand, Muriel. It's a drunk thing."

"Looking at all the stars in the sky makes me feel cosmically mindful—all my earthly concerns meaningless in the breadth of what I now witness. I’d have a better view if the Lewises would cut down those useless pine trees... Curious if those damn things are on my property. I’ll call the town surveyor in the morning and see if I can get those stupid trees removed. I hate having neighbors..."

"He manages a broad stock index fund."