Parenting Enthusiast Prints

A baby is breast feeding and father asks mother:'So at what age is he going to realize that I exist?'

'We're quite excited. We think he's developing his first disorder.'

Do you ever serve chocolate milk?

Child Psychology.

"Well, sure I'd like to instill the values of hard work and discipline, but that takes hard work and discipline."

I'm here to update your census form. Since you mailed the form in, have any of your children moved back in with you?

"This man is a wonderful primary-care husband."

'Son, it's time we had a talk about self confidence.'

'OK! I'll talk!'

'I know it's been hard to be both a father and mother to me, but now that I'm grown, Mom, how about being just a mother again.'

"No, there was no 'Buy One, Get One Free.' You're twins."

"So this is the secret to the start of labour!"

The problem child (Revised edition).

'Wrong. It takes loving parents. The only thing a village can raise is a village idiot.'

"This is the path to adulthood, You're here."

'I've sent my son to a school for gifted parents.'

"...You don't want to see me in jail do you?"

'It's OK if you want to live your sports dreams vicariously through your son, Mr. Wagner. But you'll have to do it from the bleachers.'

"Ted was severely edited as a child."

'Look, dear. Her first opinion.'

'Well you can't fault his coursework, but I can't help thinking that he still has a few unresolved personal issues!'

'Well, put a jumper on if you're cold!'

'If you want me to be a good boy, you're going to have to lower your standards.'

'Hey son, what test did you say you have today? I want to make sure I pack the right brain for you.'

'I don't need to explain what could happen should this fall into the wrong hands.'

'Sorry, Billy, but story reading takes place during 'Quality Time'. During 'Fiscal Responsibility Time' we discuss prudent investment strategies.'

'When my Dad says 'no' he means 'maybe'... when my Mom says 'no' she means no.'

'But Billy didn't want to eat his delicious alphabet soup.'

"Ouch. . . Aaaargh!!. . . Stop it!. . . "

Getting pregnant

"You should put your foot down about his smoking."

"I'm tired of this full-time job. I want a part-time job."

'Nice try, Mom! They're pinking shears.'

'It wouldn't be right if I did your homework for you!' 'At least you could try!'

"I wish you wouldn't repeat everything I shouldn't have said."