Parental Project Pillows

And so Bob's folks sent him off into the world. But not before running a few last tests, just to be sure he could handle it.

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

"I only travelled with my umbilical cord!"

"I'm starting him off with a little rope theory."

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

'He's not talking yet, but his texting skills are excellent...'

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

"Oh, Frank, look! He's sending his first tweet!"

Amazon Drones Delivering Babies

A child sitting on a swing - while playing with a hand-held electronic device or phone

'We apologise for the delay to the yum-yum train.'

D.I.Y with dad.

'And when you're done here honey, I have a nice periwinkle picked out for the foyer!'

Couple who have confused their baby's pram and the lawn mower.

"Never mind Benjamin – he just lawyers-up to get attention."

'Those are my triplets. Com, Net and Org Barnes.'

Kid is 'Born to Text'.

"I brought frankincense." "I brought gold." "I brought diapers!" "A wise woman!"

You're right-this is way better than a standing desk.

"It's not often you see a sign that is both instructional and inspirational."

I don't get the 5 paragraph essay. Do and outline. Topic. 3 examples. Conclusion. Ok. " 5 Graf Essay Stinks." Click click click. "2 long." Tap tap tap. "2 boring." "2 over." "#5grafmustdie." Thanks, Nana. It's a breakthrough! The 5-paragraph tweet!

'You wash and I'll dry.'

'We're playing I'm a mummy with lots of different daddies.'

'Have you googled me to see how old I was when I was born?'

"Not now. I'm working on my children's book."

Virtual Beach

Modern Parents

'I don't care if an app on your phone is monitoring you, you still need a baby sitter when your father and I are gone.'

My dad makes his own beer.

'Sending someone to his room was a punishment when I was a kid.'

"Santa said to stop making toys. From here on out we'll be making computers and phones. Does anyone know anything about technology?"

Phone Mittens

'We couldn't afford school pictures this year so Timmy is doing the family portraits.'

"Are we there yet? Are we there yet?..."