Parental Humor Fans Gifts

'You know how vacations are. You don't even get to the end of the block before your dad starts asking if it's over yet.'

'These baby teeth are a non-renewable resource rapidly being depleted and should bring more.'

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

'We had the baby's ultrasound photo made into wallpaper.'

The Poky Little Pupa.

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

Giving birth with your husband present may be more painful.

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

"I need to know who started it."

"Your mother and I are feeling overwhelmed, so you'll have to bring yourselves up."

'Son, sometimes I think you don't know your head from your tail. Come to think of it, it is tough.'

Dad Trophies

'Budget cuts have forced us to drop our day-care program. I've contacted your mother to come and pick you up.'

Rabies on board - a couple of rabid babies.

"Hey, Mom! Check it out! Dad converted his gardo paints to passenger pants!"

"My dad can't talk yet, but he's learned to wave bye-bye."

Sperm Whale.

"How do you know you don't like New York if you've never even tasted it?"

"Because, dang it, even cowgirls deserve a little 'me' time."

"Time for bed, guys."

Impracticle Guide to Having Babies

'No not there. Let's try it over here this time...'

"I told my mom either the sitter goes, or I go!"

'Remember,when he says 'gotta go download',he means 'go potty'.'

'Yeah, bit how does the stork get into the maternity room?'

Chilly baby.

'Push, dear! The child will be late for pre-school!'

"I'm SO lazy, I married a pregnant woman. . . !"

"I have to wear a bike helmet all the time after Mommie heard cars kill more pedestrians than cyclists!"

"But Mom, you said it was a pup tent!"

'Please tell me I'm adopted.'

'I did tell you there were speed bumps in this via.'

"Sure, Mom, I'll eat first, but then can we discuss my 'overseas adoption'?"

Ultra Sound/Downloading.

'Here's what she was reading - an articl called 'Parents can be fun'.'