Parent Of Toddlers Pillows

"Charles — we missed you at playgroup."

'We're letting you board first so the rest of the passengers will know where not ... uh, to sit.'

A young Don King

The Baby Walker

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's having a wardrobe malfunction!'

Baby vandalizes an art gallery.

"Why do small children ask so many questions?" "Why not? We need to learn, don’t we? Anyway it’s no big deal is it? Isn’t that what parents are for? You were probably the same, weren’t you? So why complain?"

'But, Mom, being good just doesn't work for me.'

'I changed my mind...I'm not thirsty anymore.'

"Bye now... it's always nice to see you and little Tommy!"

'Three little kids and their first words. Can you find out which one is the British kid?'

Kindergarten Primary School Teacher

Early Night Club

Lemonade 5c Sugar Free: 'It sure is!'

"I'm not against having more children, I'd just like to finish with this one first."

"I know he's little, but he uses it."

'Normally I'd be strongly opposed to a womanh your age electing a permanent birth control option...but in your case-'

Stroller Cellphone

"I'm going to need a pediatrician, two vets and an ornithologist."

Childhood's End

'Watch out for my little brother -- he's clothing-optional.'

MEN, WOMEN, 'What are KIDS supposed to do?'

Child wanting to play with traditional toys.

"Mum...I have to do number five million, seven hundred and twenty seven thousand, six hundred and twenty ones!"

"Choo choo doesn't work any more. Try money!"

Tantrum

American Toddlers vs British Toddlers

'I don't think those apps have made Junior smarter.'

"No kidding? And it took me 20 minutes to climb up here!"

'I went to school with Mary today: Boy that was fun!!' (colour)

'I need a helping hand.'

'Gimme a drink! His screeching siren stuck,coming back from the shops.'

"Ooooh, Mommy...do these things come with instructions?"