Overzealous Parent T-Shirts

'Please excuse my mother, this is my first interview.'

'Look, quit making excuses. You're in kindergarten now. If you ever hope to see grade one, you gotta buckle down.'

Horribly concerned about head lice, Donna Frick insisted that...

"I don't care why you crossed the road! I do care however about "how" you crossed the road: without checking for cars first!"

'Your parents are way too overprotective.'

First Steps

'Honey...you're spoiling that child.'

"Unfortunately, at this age I express glee and stark raving terror in the exact same way."

Pampered Pets.

'It's my mother. She wants to talk to you.'

'I have her registered in a pre-med nursery program.'

License, registration, and some I.D. for the small child watching what appears to be a completely inappropriate PG-13 movie in the back.

Personnel: 'I promised Mom I'd call her when I got here safely - do you mind?'

"Ya know, boys and girls studying alone like this is strictly forbidden in Iran."

"My mom can be a little over-protective ... "

"No - wait, I haven't read them all yet..."

"Daddy, you're not going to give us a sermon on responsible behavior, are you?"

"Lawsuits must really be getting out of hand."

I wish my baby came with suction cups so there was a place to put him while I shower.

"Pick two! Staying abreast of the rapidly evolving global pandemic and what it means for your middle-class suburban life. Creating holiday memories that your kids will treasure throughout their lifetimes. Remembering to eat a vegetable."

"Let's talk about your overprotective mother."

"I'm sorry your son Billy ran away, but there's not much we can do being that he's thirty-four."

"I still think we should go higher than Factor 0.5."

My mom won't let me walk to school. I might get mugged. She won't let me play sports. I might get injured. West Fester High School. And she won't let me get onto the scales. Why not? It might hurt my self-esteem.

Bring my daughter back at 11 sharp or...

'Dad - couldn't you miss just a little of my growing up?'

"Of course I trust your judgement dear. But, it can't hurt to do a quick police check on your new boyfriend."

"Mom always was a helicopter mom, and now she's got a drone!"

"What is this? A note? Gracie must have dropped it..."

'Do you think he's starting to out grow the pram?'

I used to run every day. But lately its just been a rack for my clothes.

"Sometimes I wish I could clone myself."

"I realize some of your friends have them, but you cannot have a webcam in your room."

one final word. bring my daughter home at 11pm sharp or. . .

"Jimmy has helicoptor parents."