Over-the-top Requesters T-Shirts

"Can I have another free biscuit for my dog?"

"Here's the baby's first birthday, her second, her third, look at her gifts..."

"Other folks have to pay taxes, too, Mr. Herndon, so would you please spare us the dramatics!"

'Who stuck corks on all the cursors?'

'...and this is the Mess.'

"I just called to say I love you, but come to think of it - can I borrow some money?"

"There really is such a thing as having too many pillows."

"Our greatest fears are confirmed, they've taken waffle fries off the menu."

We're not picking you up from field hockey. Take the late bus. Ok then. I'll get home at 8:30, miss dinner and have no time to study. I'll fail my classes, never get a job and live the rest of my life with you. Not true! You have a bright future as an extortionist. Or soap opera star!

"I always ask for a pony for my birthday. I find it gives the most bargaining room."

'Honey, I think you overdid the plastic canvas decorations in the bathroom.'

"Of course I try to communicate with him - I update my blog almost daily."

"It's just that they usually ask for their ASHES to be scattered!"

Gender Reveal

"Good afternoon. Feng-shui consultation bureau."

Sugar Machine

'Hello and welcome to the stupidly hyperbolic awards.'

'It's all settled, then... but first I must check in with my wife.'

'Do you take requests?'

"Could you watch my elephant while I nip out a minute?"

'We were thinking of building something a little subtle this time... haha, just kidding, make it horrible.'

Wife says: 'Very festive, but I can't seem to find the door.'

'Sorry sir, no personal trolleys allowed in the store.'

'My final request? How about 'Who Put The Overalls In Mrs. Murphy's Chaowder?''

Francis P. Weston 1935-2001: I'm fine, thanks. How are you?

"Ding dong ditch is fun, but it's better to watch their reactions when you pretend to be soliciting."

"Baldo doesn't miss a chance to tell me what he really wants."

The lovely - and extremely rare - O.C.D. Butterflies.

'Get real, Dad, I wanted a TOY dumptruck.'

Fear of the loud flush

TMI.