Otters T-Shirts

"Lookin' for otters, pal?"

Otter Tattoos

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

Husband bakes a pie

'This is Tyler; he's mommy's precious little feral-angel.'

"I'm addicted to water."

'LOOK RENOLDSON, i've had JUST about enough of your moaning and groaning! IF you can't stand the heat, GET out of the oven!' / A chef scolding his apprentice inside an oven.

Continental marshal

Two sea otters with smartphones

Man passes a storefront that reads "Napland - Tired? Come on in and lie down for awhile!"

I love Pottery.

'Maybe it's one of those super-stations.'

"I take offense, therefore I am."

'There's a problem with dinner - the roast didn't.'

Handicap Parking Only - Ticket Odds 4 to 1.

Baking Bread

"By making him retrieve the ball I'm teaching him the self-reliance he'll need every day at work."

"I feel tremendous pressure to frolic."

Hello October

"If owls are so smart, how come they don't already now who it is?"

I'm sorry, the pension fund was beaten by two lengths!

'You say that one day you win and the next day you lose? Why don't you bet on alternate days?'

"He's giving 3-1 Magic Spider in the 230."

A lumberjack chops down a tree

'My parents went to the crocodile petting zoo and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.'

October

Ear Doctor - "NEXT!!"

"You realize they won't know the difference."

"So, that would be a 'no' to working on the weekend?"

'I swear, sometimes I don't think you even try anymore, John!'

I like the look of that 'Trojan Boy'.

'Today, they voted a stock split, which means that pile of options I own are twice as worthless as they were yesterday.'

"Mr. Hudson, it's time for your hearing test."

'He's the type that gives racing a bad name.'

"I told you getting bangs was a stupid idea."