Organizational Dynamics Analyst Mugs

Library: Management Section

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

'Inevitably, I come to work early, leave late and alienate everyone.'

"That one shows our office cliques."

"They found a use for that old paper shredder."

The role of administration.

It come's to my attention that you have been doing the work of two men.

"Next on the agenda: How can we crush workers' spirit, while appearing to care?"

"It's time for your performance review where I damn you with faint praise."

"Missing a call is no excuse for eating your assistant."

'As you know, Wilson, our CEO screwed up big time, so he was fired and gets a big bonus. But because of his mistakes, you just get fired.'

'All applicants for employment must first submit to a company physical - We use it to eliminate anyone with a backbone.'

'Have you decided who's going to be team leader?'

'You seem young, Perkins. Why, I bet I was incarcerated before you were even born.'

'Don't try to use me. I'm not user friendly!'

"It's late. I am not getting into another heated discussion with you."

'Hank here brings 10 years of top sales experience to our company so let's all try to make him feel welcome while he makes you all look bad...'

'We're like one big family tree... that's why everyone is in therapy.'

'You're not the manager I expected.' - 'So blame yourself for having lousy judgement.'

'Who vetted that leader?'

"I want to know why when I'm in a room people ignore me."

"OK Hunter. Go join the 'non-verbal criticism skills' seminar!"

'Dayton, you're a decent, respectable, ethical, honest and nice guy. What the hell are you up to?'

'Cut out the hearsay and get back to work, Ms. Sims.'

"That report you wrote sure made me look good to the board... Take an extra five minutes for lunch!"

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

'I'm afraid of being left behind.'

Corporate Scapegoat of the Month (Poster hanging on company hallway)

I don't feel very secure on this job.

'Lets see now, Henderson, you've not shown any initiative because nobody asked you to.'

'I never question your ability. I never even mention it.'

"Oh, he claims I bit his head off, did he? And I suppose you BELIEVED him?"

Age-salary ratio