Orchestral Guide T-Shirts

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

Orchestra.

'OK, everybody...'Louie, Louie' from the top!'

'Trust me, there's nobody to rescue that way...'

Trombone emerges from pram. Mother says: 'I'm a firm believer in starting them young.'

Flyfishing for dummies.

'Oh, I'm not a guru -- I'm just big on personal space.'

Quartet.

Music Lessons

Malcolm Sargent

"Serenity's cool and all, but when do we get to bliss?"

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

Occupational Hazards.

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

"All the celebrities come here."

Sir Edward Elgar

Team Flute

'Sorry I'm late everybody,I got lost.'

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

Animal Band.

Enlightened Cursing

"How awful! - was he a band, or an orchestra conductor?"

A woman playing the flute

'I warned him about thinking the unthinkable!'

"Hungry? I'm ravenous, Norman, I could murder a lentil cutlet."

'Do you ever just feel like getting away from it all?'

"You've traveled all this way just to score some pot? Okay—How much do you want?"

"We tried six speakers, then twelve, and finally we put in the Pittsburgh Symphony, yet we still feel something is lacking."

Violinist.

Sport, Political, Religious and New Yorker Cartoonist Gurus.

A Lightning Conductor.

Musician Sneezing Musical Notes