Opinionated Sibling Pillows

'That's birth certificate fraud!'

At the Museum

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

Boy and Bear and Monster

'Nope. I didn't see any dogfish.'

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

"Soon you'll be sucking your thumb AND tying your shoes...they call it multitasking."

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

PET THEORIES

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

"I don't care if you saw this in a western..."

"Better luck next time, kid."

'I've been told before that I'm very mature for a three year old.'

Bathroom Fairy

It's my biggest project - a database of all my sister's boyfriends.

The Charge of the Kids

6th Grade Do-You-Own Research Fair

'I've been watering myself by taking showers. How come I'm not growing as tall as your plants?'

A balloon vendor hands a child his only 'good' face out of many,less than desireable faces.

Fade to black...

"Act your birth order!"

C'mon boy, speak! Speak!

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- she's kind of a starter kit.'

'The real story behind the Princess and the Pea.' A queen saying to a little girl eating, 'Eat all your peas or else you'll have to put them under your mattress.'

'Baby sand shark eat their siblings.'

Four balloons

'...and it absolutely must be assembled!'

"How many times do I have to tell you to quit going through your little brother!"