Opinionated Sibling Pillows

'That's birth certificate fraud!'

At the Museum

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

Boy and Bear and Monster

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

'Nope. I didn't see any dogfish.'

"Soon you'll be sucking your thumb AND tying your shoes...they call it multitasking."

What do you want, the moon on a stick?

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

PET THEORIES

"I don't care if you saw this in a western..."

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

Magnet School. A "magnet school"? Won't that mess up the computers?

Bathroom Fairy

"Better luck next time, kid."

'I've been told before that I'm very mature for a three year old.'

The Charge of the Kids

I think you meant to huff 'n' puff at the next house over.

It's my biggest project - a database of all my sister's boyfriends.

6th Grade Do-You-Own Research Fair

'I've been watering myself by taking showers. How come I'm not growing as tall as your plants?'

Fade to black...

A balloon vendor hands a child his only 'good' face out of many,less than desireable faces.

Authorization for the Use of Farce

"I don't get it either, but my mom keeps telling me to hang up the phone, so I do it to make her happy."

"Act your birth order!"

C'mon boy, speak! Speak!

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- she's kind of a starter kit.'

'My brother got all the glory. For me it was Randolph with your nose so pink, you really make my sleigh team stink.'

'The real story behind the Princess and the Pea.' A queen saying to a little girl eating, 'Eat all your peas or else you'll have to put them under your mattress.'

Philosophie.fr Bulletin Board - 1936

'Baby sand shark eat their siblings.'

Four balloons

"How many times do I have to tell you to quit going through your little brother!"