Online Trolldetective Gifts

Alternative Medicine

"..Your analysis and medication would be perfect if you were a goat."

'See, dear, you can't believe everything you read. It says so right here on the internet!'

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

The new Physics

'I've been googling your condition and I'm afraid to say...I think I might have it myself.'

"Didn't I warn you about buying medication from the internet?!"

Tiger discovers the online wildlife trade.

"What a disappointment. When you said your dad was a troll, I thought he'd be living under a bridge."

"If this is secret information the government doesn't want us to know, how come we can read about it on facebook?"

Internet Shoplifting

Don't look know, but I think you're being Googled.

"He's just discovered that out 450,000 blog rebuttal campaign was directed against a 12 year old in Swindon using his mums computer."

"They'll never guess how we stole their data."

I'd rather be phishing.

"Hello, I am a Nigerian Prince and I need your help!!! Please send me $500 and your bank routing number. You will rewarded with 10% of 12.7 million dollars and my undying friendship. Best wishes, Prince John Barron."

'Computer crime' 'To see your belongings visit our website www,burgular.com'

"I've already go t a diagnosis from homedoc.com..."

'...if he only knew what I wrote about him on my blog.'

"The tweet you posted last night struck a chord around the world, united all factions, and basically altered the course of humanity."

The Darknet starts right here.

'You have a harmless but highly irritating form of nervous disorder we call D.Y.I. - Diagnosing Yourself on the Internet.'

Able to Google Stuff Man

"We've gleaned all we need to know about you from the internet, but we'll keep your resume as a great example of creative writing."

Berlitz guide to Scamese

You were right. I should have gone for the BT package.

'I see you have some blended content. Some of it's tue, some of it's false.'

Identity in the networks

"That's not what it says on the Web."

'Four out of five websites disagree with your diagnosis.'

"I already know he's gone — it's been on the Internet."