Online Surveys Prints

'Shouldn't we be doing this online?'

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

Hello, my name is riskyy@ronny5 and I am addicted to comments boards.

Nervous Oral Testing

"Exactly how undecided would you say you were at this precise moment?"

Travelogue

'Ask your computer.'

'Please, Ma'am — I'm running out of paper!'

'I checked my symptoms on the internet and I think I might be dead!'

'For? Against? Undecided? Uniformed? Apathetic? This is one accurate poll!'

"A new survey shows only 3% of Americans take surveys, but everyone believes the stupid things."

"Would you have a moment to take a short survey about your experience?"

'Yes. No. Sometimes. No. No. Yes. Don't know. Sometimes. Yes. Mo.'

"Our latest survey shows our customers basically want just three things: prompt service, and apology when mistakes occur and to be treated politely..."

"I've already go t a diagnosis from homedoc.com..."

"I have to tell you, I got a totally different diagnosis from someone named PookyPoo on medi-answer.com."

Pollsters: Mori, Gallup and Just Nosey.

'I went online to check out my ancestry and I found that my dad, 10,000 times removed, was an amoeba!'

'What seems to be the problem?' - 'I've got bubonic plague.' - 'Okay... so what symptoms do you have?' - 'Well, I feel chilly and I had a muscle cramp. They're both symptoms of plague.' - 'I hate Wikipedia.' - 'It says here that you should prescribe...'

"Rate your experience and you could win an Amazon gift voucher."

"It's ten o'clock, and seventy-seven per cent of the people think all is well!"

"And how do you feel when your patient does online research and thinks he's an expert?"

'Can you spare a moment for the Universe, sir?'

'Those are interesting questions Timmy. I suggest you ask your search engine.'

'It's yet another customer survey asking about our last oil change. Was it poor, fair, very good, blissful or orgasmic?'

"Since they graduated, have any of your children moved back in with you?"

"On a scale of one to ten. How happy would you say you are?"

"Good evening. Can I start you off with a customer satisfaction survey?"

"One moment, sweetie, I'm just asking Google how I should react."

"Excuse me, sir - I'm conducting a survey about stress in the workplace."