Online Scene Observer Pillows

'Man... how I hate these pop-up's!'

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

'-and you're living proof that ALL men are not born equal, runt!'

"I'll have a cup of coffee, and would you mind removing that ridiculous painting and turning off the Wilco?"

A man looks up at the earth

No one knew it, but Gerald was about to execute what he called 'The Move.'"

"[Old Steak Bone Tavern]"

"The best things in life are free. The rest are married."

The successful rubbernecker...

'Not...one...drop.'

"I know it's only been a little while since we've been allowed to mingle again but I'm already getting really tired of people."

Abstraction and recognition

"It's all good – but some of it is better."

'Why is there a 'Like' button but no 'Despise' button?'

"You didn't post anything on social media today. So, the church sent someone over to witness miracle."

'Man, when was the last time you had your eyes tested?'

'He's so fast he has to stop to clean the insects off his glasses.'

"A lot of voter's will be floating today."

"Good lord! Four of my dearest Facebook friends died last week!"

'I say, it really shows off your astigmatism to its greatest advantage, doesn't it?'

'He popped the question last night. 'Who do you think will win the Cup?'

Oculist.

Hurdles with Steps

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First Contact

'He's so unlucky that he gets into accidents that started happening to someone else.'

"Do you mean you're really famous or youtube famous?"

"I can't remember if I didn't like his second book or his second wife."

"It's 6 o'clock. Do you know what's trending now?"

Betty's Ex, Ray, Glasses.

The Crowd at Epsom Derby

'Good memory. Now turn around and let's try it again. I've put the chart on the opposite wall since your last visit.'