Online Research Enthusiast Pillows

"Nurse! Call the doctor, I've found out what is wrong with me."

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'My name's Google and I'm being inundated with requests for information about every damn thing imaginable, by people I don't even know...It's endless!'

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

'Here's MY information highway!'

Likes: $2.

'When I asked you to do research for your assignment, I meant the library not on Google!'

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

Thank you for not doing research that has already been done.

"Sorry, website closed for lunch."

Man doing a search on a computer

'An encyclopedia? I don't know. Let's look up what it is on Wikipedia.'

'It's nothing that a few stem cells and 75 years of research can't fix.'

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

'After researching our dream vacation online with reviews, commentaries, we cams and pictures, we felt we'd been there and didn't need the trip!'

'Those are my triplets. Com, Net and Org Barnes.'

Travelogue

'Maybe we have the wrong subject for this brain mapping project.'

"The Internet ate my baby!"

"We no longer have to hide. Bigfoot hunters now only search for us online. It's going to be lonely around here."

"Alright. What should we watch first - the Youtube video or the comments below?"

'Do you have 4G up here?'

'Ask your computer.'

Peer-reviewed journal publication.

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

'How do I get people to visit my...'

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"

"If you prayed to Google instead of God, you might get a constructive response."

"Home is where the WiFi is."

I e-bay t-shirt.

"Stop! Information overload. I need to rebuffer."

>Enter new password: BEEF STEW >Password not stroganoff.

"I'm not going to shoot the messenger, but I'm also not going to renew his grant."