Online Persona Curator Gifts

Bird of Paradise as social media

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

'We're out of earshot now, so you can drop the phoney, Oxbridge accent.'

"I have a personal blog, therefore I am!"

Man chooses head from cupboard.

"Of course I have an imaginary alter-ego. You'll find it on Facebook."

Types of online-ing

'Save or delete...decisions, decisions..it's just like being at work!'

'You look exactly like your website.'

"I keep changing my profile picture."

"And here's a shot of us showing you pictures from our last vacation."

Public Speaking Shoes

"Well, if you can't accept me as I really am, have you seen my Facebook page?"

'I'm tagging some unflattering photos of friends, so my tagged photos don't look quite so bad.'

'Talk about snooty. She was listed as 'most likely to be googled' in the class yearbook.'

"It's nothing personal. I just enjoyed your online presence better."

"Install that, then uninstall that. Open that, then close that. Update that, then delete that. Run that program, then end that program..."

'According to your social network activities, you're a man-mad, boozy little hussy. You can start working here tomorrow.'

'You look exactly like your tweets.'

'Not the 'Grizzlydog2576'? I love your posts!'

'Can I have a few minutes to update my profile page?'

"I want my profile picture to scream 'personality'."

"You appear to be more interesting on you website, than you actually are"

"....and please make my life as interesting as I make it look in Facebook."

"You might want to tone down that profile."

"Help us reconcile the brilliant, dedicated employee from your references with the complete knucklehead from your social media accounts."