Olympic Coach Pillows

'The children are leaving the nest, honey! They're not diving in the Olympics...That was at leas a 6.5 by the way.'

'No swimming. No breathing.'

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

Child about to jump off ironing board into bath.

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

'I know what you're thinking, are those legal shoes.'

'I love doing things with you, Dad but couldn't you just coach my soccer team?'

"This crucial pre-game drill keeps you focused and eliminates distractions!"

'I think he's doing ok, the coach says he has the attention span of a goldfish.'

'Excuse me, I ordered Matzo Ball soup.'

"Gracie, I'm proud of you. Your team lost, but you tried your best and that's all that counts."

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

So far the coaching exchange program was hitting a few snags.

'It's too early to say but my lad may be good enough to swim professionally.'

Westview High School Soccer League Victory Dinner

"It started as a crusade. Now it's just a commute."

"Well I didn't see the incident myself.."

'You haven't heard the best thing. . .no referees.'

Soccer coach of the year.

"Okay...let's concentrate on discussing strategy during halftime."

A Little Long Jumper.

'He's missed six goals today. I bet he could kick himself.'

Wilfried Zaha

'Is the water cold?'

Goalkeeper makes the wrong save.

Football

Psychic diving competition.

'You'll never be the next Micheal Phelps if you don't start working on your breaststroke.'

Extra Long-jump

Carpool lane (a car driving into a long pool).

Game time.

'Will that be coach?'

Fishy tail.