Old Into New Story Lover Prints

Jesus turns water into Vitamin Water.

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

Audio Books

Kid to mom: 'Tell me again about the time you helped fortress a city, subdue hostile fire and got home and baked us all raspberry strudels.'

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

'He took from the rich and gave to the poor? It sounds like wealth redistribution.'

'Dad's bedtime story was decent, but the special effects were non-existent.'

Ant story: 'and so they worked all day and they worked all night and then they worked some more, the end.'

'I've had the place gob-stopper-dashed.'

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

"I'm sad to hear everybody lived happily ever after. That means no sequels to this story."

Fyodor Dostoevsky

"What did Jesus order?"

"If she thinks I'm just gonna come running on home, wagging my tail behind me..."

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up

"Now here's a tale that'll make you hair stand on end"

Alice in Wonderland - The Pig Baby.

"Goodness! These tomatoes look so good!"

7 More Dwarfs

Alice in Wonderland: Alice and the Dodo.

"At first, I was teaching Job a lesson, but now I'm just messing with him."

Queen says: 'Mirror, mirror, on the wall ... 'It's all so subjective' is not an acceptable answer.'

'And all the executive board members got lovely big payouts and lived happily ever after!'

William Tell

'I'm a writer.' - 'What a coincidence, I'm a reader.'

Rapunzel's short-lived career in the restaurant business.

Fairy tale

Men discussing a book on a chat show

"The Ugly Duckling didn't know why he was so attracted to swan culture."

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.