Ofsted Inspector T-Shirts

'You don't think you were a bit harsh on that school?'

Your lobster was off!

Secretive Weigh In.

'As I walk through the halls, I see teachers teaching and students learning and I say to myself, 'what wonderful school, what a wonderful world.''

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

HELLth Food Sprouts

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

"Out with the old fish, in with the new."

'I had no idea would be a choice.'

Bottled water straight from the Potomac, Congo and Ganges. Bottled waters that never had much market share.

"Well, okay I'll eat it. But, only if you have a medical team on stand by."

Toxic Waste Lorry/Toxic Additives Lorry

'Ere-we distinctly asked for SAM an' Ella!'

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

'You forgot the product label.'

"There is nothing dangerous about GM foods!" "Keep talking or we'll smash your head in"

'This tuna is being recalled. It contains seahorse.'

"I've been mutated into the strawberry field. Get me out now."

Horse meat scandal.

"And here is the quality control department for our deviled eggs."

"We can serve a rare handburger, but because of health regulations, this room will have to be heated to 160 degrees."

"I think the milk's off!"

'Use by June 2007. Gah' - 'Use by July 2007. Double gah.' - 'Best of a bad bunch...'

Our Troubled Chowders

"The transformation is pretty bad, but the worst part is filling out the paperwork for the adverse events."

"Tonight's specials include beef wellington (long regarded as a major source of cholesterol and saturated fat), Cajun-style swordfish (suspected of containing PCBs and toxic metals), and chicken teriyaki (recent increase in the incidence of salmonella whi

'Are these mushrooms edible?'

'They're doing their tests now?

Roger couldn't understand why his diet wasn't working.

Chef swatting flies into a bowl in a sushi bar.

'Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.'

'I don't know what to make of genetically modified food'...