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In 5 Years...

'How could Homer write The Iliad and The Odyssey with a quill pen on parchment when I can't write a memo with a computer?'

'The only reason we're fighting the merger is we don't want to change the stationary.'

Free Printer with Purchase of Ink

It's a MA-nila envelope.

Family size, economy size, giant size

'Oh, he's on ebay again, trying to sell a case of white correction fluid he pilfered from the office back in 1984.'

"Can your 3D printer makes a 2D printer that doesn't have a blinking red light?"

The fax machine had stopped and they did not know why.

'And this is something I invented several years ago called 'The 6 Hole Punch'.'

'Yes, but he's a very moderate graffiti artist -- he uses sticky notes.'

"Tablets? Are we talking digital or paper?"

"…and if you want to spend less, there is this old model which still works just fine"

"Scratch and sniff ... it smells like mimeograph paper."

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

Lemonade Inc.

"I bet you're curious about what's going on in the R&D Department."

"And best of all, it comes fully loaded!"

"No, kid, we don't call these 'attachment icons.' We call them paperclips."

Joust Sharpener

"This new chair has the smoothest 360 swivel action on the market!"

"Sorry sir - the self-propelling pencils have all just walked out..."

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

'Fred's Office Supply? I'd like to order a dozen more desk bins and a step-ladder please.'

Home Business - Electric Stapler.

Workaholic's Hoilday Appartment

Busy office.

"Here's to non-electric sharpeners."

'This plant which you brought to me from your office snubs all my other plants.'

Senior Partner works at a desk, sign on wall behind her says 'Ms. Davis senior partner - formerly: 'Hey You'.

'But this is what you demanded; a corner office with Windows.'

'Never trust emails. You can't shred them.'

(No caption. Signs on file cabinets drawers read, "Files Saved to Hard Drive," "Files Saved to Disk," "Files Saved to Traveldrive," "Trash.")