
"Mr Wilson says he'll stop harassing me if I go to bed with him"
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"Mr Wilson says he'll stop harassing me if I go to bed with him"
"Staff support"
'What's wrong now?'
"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."
Well, I see Wilcox is finally using his head...as a paperweight!
"They found a use for that old paper shredder."
Not a surprise, coming from the new boss - who looks about 6 years old.
'As far as clock watching goes, you take the biscuit.'
"Since you somehow managed to get past my moat, I'll give you a few minutes."
"This is the communications workshop, right? Let’s get started, I’m prepared!"
"Dave, quick word about religious symbols in the workplace..."
"Leadership ISN'T just about trying to be BETTER than everyone else!"
To determine which department would be awarded the Billings contract, employees agreed to play a best-of-five dodgeball tournament.
That endless instant between initial eye contact and conscious recognition.
Bureau of the Damned
'Ms. Hatton, take a letter, a number and a hike...'
"Did you read this report? The average member of staff takes 19 minutes for lunch!"
'But before we move on, allow me to belabor the point even further...'
"The camera is mounted on your desk for a reason. There's been some paperclips missing, and we think you're the culprit."
"Ha! Today we informed the boss about our rights!"
"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"
"I'm going in."
'Not my short list, O'Neil! You're on my other list!
'Just checking that I've turned off the lights, dear!'
Bring your problems to work day.
"It's no good Charlie, I'm done for! You've got to go it alone, Charlie. You've got to go on and nail that presentation! Nail it for me!"
'Always the wise guy.'
"This is Harold. Harold is part of nature's food chain."
STRIP Hambone: Looking at problems
"When I make a joke, that light will turn on. That's your cue to laugh."
'Have you heard the news about Susan in logistics?...'
"This is Abramson, our new piñata."
"He's not good with criticism."
"Holidays with the family... Boss, I'm so happy to be back again! May I do some unpaid extra hours please?"
"It has come to my attention, Collins, that you are hydrating on company time."
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