Offense Admirer Gifts

'OK... But can he play defense?'

"Well, what did you expect? They were both missing vital organs."

'This wasn't quite the fairytale ending that Colin had anticipated...'

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

Raheem Sterling

Bernie the Monday morning quarterback meets David the Monday morning linebacker.

"All those training sessions, seminars and studies... ... to reinforce the reality of womens equality and extirpate any remnants of a deluded belief in male superiority When all we had to do was show them Rachel Daly doing a bicycle kick GASP!"

"Have I ever told you how sexy you look when you sit through overtime?"

Wilfried Zaha

'Don't be a wisenheimer.'

'I had to give a short speech last night. It was a hoot!'

Football Sculpture.

"Do you know a good chiropractor?"

Little ship of horrors

"Can't stop watching. That ribbon is amaaazing..."

Disco Owls

"Don't knock Florida! Where else can a 73-year old man get a 35-year mortgage?"

"I'm more of a day owl."

Texas Love Triangle - where a cowboy's dear and interloper play.

Stret boy making a comment about a military man

Rugby Mad.

'Gordon likes to base our courtship on that of the Guatamalan swamp owl...'

'Nice, I can see you've taken Day-School classes to further your education...'

"I can't have the wart removed, I just got the Wicked Witch role in 'Wizard of Oz'."

Owl

'We could easily share this nest: You would use it during the day and I would use it at night...'

"Olive, twist, or vole?"

Euphemistic.

'The bad news is he wants to be a jockey.'

'If it's alright with your agent, Kolwalski, I'd like to hand the ball off to you.'

Sergio Aguero

'Would you believe that somebody asked me to deliver their mail yesterday Where did that come from'

Owl seeing how many times it can twist it's head around - "...14, 15, 16, there goes the record."

Daley Thompson

Owl Aging Support Groups