Offbeat Animal Companion Collector T-Shirts

'Perhaps you'd be happier with a dog!'

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

"Where is everyone?" "You had 'everyone' killed." "Stalin family reunion"

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

Diner

'I'll be honest with you. The pay isn't great.'

Are you the guy who ate my brother?

Imagine

'You're the watchdog. Do you honestly expect us to believe you didn't see anything?'

"Since when isn’t a taxidermied animal a comfort pet?" "Since forever!" "Dang it!"

"Actually I never loved you."

'Roger, you're just a Rooster and I'm just a Hen. Is all of this necessary?'

'Someone's feeling bullish.'

"It's a bit of a surprise. He has eaten people before, but only when he felt threatened. Your husband must have provoked him."

'How long have you had this obsessive hatred of cats?'

"I'm thinking considerably longer. How about you, Alan?"

Rattache

"Now that's art!"

Animal worries.

"Good news. Pork bellies just dropped four points."

'Can I have your autograph...?'

Animal rescue center

'When I said you'd have to jump through hoops, I meant you'll have to literally jump through hoops.'

Chippunks

'You have some nice car chasing scenes here.'

"We pride ourselves on defying expectations."

"Definitely work-related."

'The stuff legends are made of'

"I had no alternative Mr. Prendergast. Your daughter fell and broke her leg."

'Ah look, what a lovely tortoise shell cat.'

"We don't do that kind of cattle futures, ma'am. You want Madam Mystic down the street."

Competitors complained that Sir Hops-A-Lot's souther steed gave him an unfair advantage."

Thinks Bob: At last, the most practical house pet since the goldfish.

"We raise our beef humanely."