Oceanic Observer T-Shirts

'Everybody...keep quiet and stay away from the windows - it's a Jehovah's Witness!'

'Nobody knows what happened to her but I've heard it was a complicated birth.'

"Watch it. Here comes the law."

Why all mothers deserve a special day.

"I suggest we either move the chair further inland, or get a higher chair."

'Call me paranoid if you like, but I feel as if people are watching me all the time...'

'Be honest - do I have someone stuck in my teeth?'

"Damn...wrong shoal!..."

"Next year, I'm pleasuring myself."

"Well, it is a good property. The price is low because it is harder to negotiate due to its S-bend configuration."

How's My Sailing?

"Another year older? Aren't you worried about losing your hearing?"

Good Carp, Bad Carp

'I was thinking-what if the tide's OUT?'

'Still think nuclear testing is harmless?'

Dead mermaid

Incognito Bonito - 'I don't know me, but I do know you!'

"Apparently they had some sort of technical issue right from the start."

The Sea Angler: And it is advisable to understand the language of the sea.

"The phrase I hate the most is, 'you hit the nail on the head.'"

Rob The Grinder admires the Nobby Shropshire One

Titan or trawler?

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

"May I put you on hold? I was on another line."

"...so it appears we were talking to his butt that entire time."

Clownfish entertain sea life by hitting each other in the face with octopi.

"Of course it's alien abductions! How else would you explain the, 'November Phenomenon'?"

"Never mind how I got up here....just call the fire department."

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

"Are we there yet?"

Olly really didn't know his arse from his elbow.

"You may enjoy swimming with the dolphins, Howard, but do they enjoy swimming with you?"

'You've got to help my son, Doctor — he's joined a cult that crawls up on beaches!'

"How do you feel about working a four-day week?"

"Dad! I can't believe we come to the beach and you set up all the way out here! I can barely see the ocean...we're so far from the wa..."