Numeracy Pillows

'That's from the last year the data was available.'

'Is that why our games of hide and seek are over so quickly?'

'He just learned to count last week and last night he invented 69'

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

"Do you promise to love, honour and contribute to the gross national product?"

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

Today we learned to count to one.

'1,2,3 4,5,6 7,8,9...'It's the little things that count.(little figurines counting).

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

Three businessmen using a pulley system to change a graph

"Arithmetic gets a lot harder when you run out of fingers and toes."

'Scratch 3 and 5. 3's had a fight and 5's just going to live together instead.'

"Let's get married, Miss Harris, and have 2.8 children!"

Counting part time employees is the new math.

Gloat

"Six out of ten statisticians prefer to be in the majority."

Staff Yearbook

'The deficit doesn't look nearly so bad now that we've switched to Arabic numerals.'

Economy Slows: 'It's still too fast for me.'

'According to our fact finding committee, our stock won't be worth a dime this quarter.'

But under a different accounting convention ...

Teacher: 'As an adult you'll probably only use a quarter of what you're taught at school - which brings us to fractions.'

An Everyday Explanation of the Federal Budget.

"Yo, this should be a two."

"The hardest to convert are inches to centimeters."

"Mine's bigger than yours."

Warning: Math Ahead!

Sister to brother: 'It's kind of like alphabet soup, only for numbers crunchers.'

The IRS emptied my pouch.