Nostalgic Natterers Gifts

'I'm reminded of my age whenever I see a lady I used to know and learn that she's her granddaughter.'

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas

Large print rock'n'roll section

Rock and Roll

"OK, I know that this is borderline inappropriate, but just hear me out ..."

"Welcome to the Short Staffed Cafe serving food like your grandma cooked. Is your grandma busy? We really need a cook."

Geriatrics clinic: 'Wine, women and song, Doc! But not swashbuckling too!'

Still living with parents....

"Drat!"

"It's odd, but once I'm full, the last thing I want to smell is blood in the water."

"Aww! look how small your nose was when we first got married."

'We have to get them out more.'

"When I bought him, I went for craftsmanship. Now I wish I had gone for snuggliness."

Sitting Out the Lambada

"Lenny's right. Calling it 'an opportunity to reach a new generation of listeners' has a better ring to it than 'total sellout'."

'Second childhood, eh?'

'When I was a student, wireless data transmission meant passing notes in class.'

'Here son, let me tie your shoe strings before you get your diploma.'

'But it's my favourite jumper...'

'Walter just retired after 37 years at the shoe store.'

"When I was a child I spoke as a child... but when I became a man I put away childish things... except for my Cocoa Puffs... I still love Cocoa Puffs."

Wooden ship with large Advertising sails for Seasickness, scurvey, mutiney

'Here's a song about a girl that seemed a lot less creepy when we wrote it 34 years ago.'

'Well, it might be hard to believe now, but in my youth, I was the fastest animal on land...'

"The Sculleys, the Jensons, the Walkers, Freedy, Joan, Don and the Bowes. Oh, well, Madame de Stael had to start somewhere."

'This is my chat room.'

"Remember when we were members of a desirable demographic?"