News Observer T-Shirts

What´s smoking Maduro?

'Our strategy is to avoid this tree retroactively.'

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

"Dad, please tell me again about that mass production and consumerism."

"Would you relax? They never look up."

I've Always Wanted to Be Oppressed By Someone Who Looks Like Me

I'm over-educated and under-employed. That's why there's no MIDDLE class anymore.

Fear of news.

Life on Earth - The original chat room.

"I know he's funny, boy, but he’s also the president of the United States."

State Budget.

"The election's over, Trump won, the illegals are being deported and I'm here for one of them there high-paying American jobs he promised."

Politicians are from Uranus.

The North Portico of the White House runs away crying.

What if Huckabee Were a Fundamentalist Hindu?

'Mark my words! Our enemies will test this young guy with a huge international crisis as soon as he's electe! But don't worry, he'll be fine!', 'Come here, Joe -- let me give you a nice fist bump!'

Upon graduation, all of the clowns would gather to find out where their assignments would be.

Frankly, it’s too grim for a comedy, and too silly for a tragedy.

"On the one hand, I'm glad they're cutting the school year short...on the other hand..."

'It was my unfair dismissal claim cap.'

"I'm telling you! They don't know anything! No one is in charge!"

Yanis Varoufakis and Wolfgang Schauble

Man has a seatbelt and 'calm down tablets' to watch the world news.

'Stocks are down. Bonds are down. Terrorism and natural disasters are up. Ask your doctor if medical marijuana is right for you...'

"People think the government has a bottomless pit of money....but sometimes we have to make sacrifices!"

'Our ratings are down. Let's blame it on the media.'

"I beg your pardon," said Alice, "but which of you is the Democrat?"

"...But then it turned out there weren't any WMDs on the moon after all."

'Okay, maybe I was defeated for re-election, but at least I beat the point spread!'

Books: Self-Improvement Just keeping up with Joneses.

Middleast Peace

'That's a very good question - Are you trying to make trouble?'

Bat

"They heard about the 'Party Hearty' legislation."

Dear Sadie, I'm just an aging Baby-Boomer who still believes in America, and sees all the good around me, but I don't understand why we've become so mean. How can I feel good about us again? Signed, Marlemarion. Great question. There's an easy answer as to how you can feel better about the world. Change your name to something normal! I just don't agree with the @#$% premise that we've gotten mean.