New Security Role Mugs

Airport Security. Just pass the wand over them, Ernie. Keep your "abracadabras" to yourself.

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

'Manager. . . Commander. . . Chieftain. . . King!'

Businessman on stilts: 'I had to step over a lot of people to get where I am today.'

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

"We're looking for that perfect blend of vision, ambition and ethical ambiguity."

Leadership suits you

High security Santa's grotto

"On the plus side, I finally have a key to the executive washroom."

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

"He's a guard dog."

"OK, you're good and just the guy we need in security."

Dog barking at everything except a burglar.

'The ultimate sign of success is when no one puts you on hold.'

Unto thee shall pass the executive laser pointer. Take this authority and delegate it.

"I see you've security marked your property."

"You're either lying or not telling the truth."

New company policy...next time you miss a meeting I need a note from a doctor or a subpoena from a judge.

'I hear you got your increase.' - 'Yes, that proves my theory, if you whine enough, you get anything you want.'

Office meeting

Not a surprise, coming from the new boss - who looks about 6 years old.

"It's all a matter of planning...."

"Well the good news is that we did save a little money by not investing in cyber crime protection...."

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

The role of administration.

The new boss brought a sense of urgency.

Surprised chicken: 'I know. I can't believe it either.'

"How have you managed to keep your job?"

The little engine that could delegate.

Pile of top secret files on a train. Man saying 'Is that seat free'

"It's a fantastic computer! It's so old that none of today's hackers know how to hack it!"

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

"Ok, I found a secure line."