New Parent Laughter Prints

'Your son couldn't come. He sent his sister.'

'Do I need a pin number to make a withdrawal?'

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

"Use your inside scream."

"I said, was... it... a... difficult... birth?"

'BEEP! BEEP! Pregnant Lady Reversing!...'

'Congratulations Mr. Dumley, you have a lovely little thing...'

Cupid and stork ambush young couple.

'Oh Darling look. He's got your colour boogies!'

"I can hardly wait for him to start leading a life of quiet desperation."

'Oh wonderful! All day I've been waiting for that burp!'

'Mom, will the baby come with bundled software?'

Family.

'This might be a good time to discuss a few grievances.'

Husband and Child in Pram

Honey, Can You Buy Me Some Sanitary Towels?

They Removed my Brain.

Beware of teething baby.

'There's been no stopping him since he said his first word this morning!'

'Sandra, I think the baby needs his oil changed.'

"I think our bundle of joy needs his mommy, dear!"

'I don't believe it - At school all my teachers said I was an underachiever!'

"Twins!...Who's the other father?"

"Oh please, go on, just for the weekend."

'That's my girl. The one in the white uniform.'

Twins

'It's OK, being completely egocentric is perfectly normal for someone your age.'

"When do I get my phone call"

"You went here instead of the maternity ward. Fortunately, we experts in delivery too!"

Mobile Phone Mobile.

Clearance sale. Everything must go!

"Did he sleep through the night again?"

"I told you I was too old to have a baby."

"Dress it up all you want – it's still and invasion of my privacy."

3 Kings - "I think nappies would have been more useful than Frakinsense."