New Job In Hospitality T-Shirts

'No tipping please.'

'The Princess and the Mint.'

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

Social Importance: When the maitre d' knows your name.

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

The Backslider Bar.

Fined Dining

Reception

Bell boy!

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."

"She'll have a Shirley Temple, and I'll have a Shirley Temple's mother."

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

A private jet takes off

Courtyard of the Hotel de France, Montreuil.

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

"You've ordered comfort food. May I recommend a comfort wine?"

"What's happened to Quiche?"

"Are you sure you want to see the kitchen? The chef is naked."

"So, you want me to go all the way back to the kitchen just to get you a menu...? Couldn't I just give you a link to our, online menu?!"

Prawn Cocktail Please

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

"Valet park only"

'You'll find it has a bouquet reminiscent of cherries and chocolate, a silky texture and best of all, for me, a 72% gross margin.'

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

'He must be going economy!'

Womb service: A special room service for pregnant Women

"This is a little awkward, but you've been our guest for a while now, and we all have work in the morning..."