New Home With Lots Of Storage T-Shirts

'Our giant sale now on!'

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

Domestic Superheroes!!

LAY ZEE FUK

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

Lady of the Cake.

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

The wonderful world of cheese.

"Great cruise except the zip lining got flooded."

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

Gardener

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

Allotment

"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."

"And this is our media room."

'A little piece of advice, Verl. . . cut your sandwich loaf on a diagonal . . . that way people will think they're gettin' more.'

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

Painting the Ceiling

"I'm thinking of turning this home office into a man-cubicle."

Beach Barbecue

Shed Into Dream Playhouse.

Rose Garden

"Man's best friends."

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"