New Home Discovery T-Shirts

'Hey mom, look! One of Dad's old report cards! Boy, has he got a lot of explaining to do!'

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

LAY ZEE FUK

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

Lady of the Cake.

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

"You go on in, I’m just going to catch up with the moon for a few minutes."

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

The wonderful world of cheese.

"Great cruise except the zip lining got flooded."

Gardener

Allotment

"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

"And this is our media room."

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

Beach Barbecue

Rose Garden

'A little piece of advice, Verl. . . cut your sandwich loaf on a diagonal . . . that way people will think they're gettin' more.'

Shed Into Dream Playhouse.

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

"Careful with that - the wife made it at pottery class."

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

"I think I perferred the plain magnolia"

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

'Bad luck duck - he's on your side of the bed.'

"Get... a-nother room!"

'Your fancy new grill works great. . .and we didn't even have to turn it on.'

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

'With my parents out of the house, I can finally start my long awaited mural project.'

"The following film has been formatted to fir the screen of the newer and more expensive television set."

Candle Portraits.