New Coaching Position Pillows

A Puppet Named Juan

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

I like the Jets...I guess

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

Reach for the Star.

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

"I hate performance review season."

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

Go! Means NOW!

The trauma of losing.

Time Is Money

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

Feedback should be sought for genuine reasons, not because you want compliments. . .

"To make this interview more entertaining I would like you to take a breath of helium before answering the questions."

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

Bears

Bringing Your Child To The Bicycle Race

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

A married couple share the same pole vault.

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

"Some advice please...How do I squeeze 9 days work into 5 and still see my family?"