Navigation Instructor Pillows

'I know where we are! Check the map for a street named 'One-Way Road'!'

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

Captain in a storm

"Mind the whale, dear."

Man stood by signpost to 'here' or 'there'.

'Are we there yet?'

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

Man on Snowdon with GPS system - "I'd be lost without it."

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

'My Pilot-Fish is on holidays, so I'm using a GPS System to find my way around...'

Goldfish bowl on raft...

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

How can I enjoy that clean, fresh, salt air when I'm up to my neck in garbage?

'Well if I'm so 'bloody useless' perhaps you'd better read the map!'

'Slip Ahoy!'

"We have a potentially serious problem accruing on the poop deck."

'Well, it wasn't my lucky day... first there was that shark and then I bimped into a bunch of beaver!'

"Touché"

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

'Listen Honey! Sounds like there might be a little white water close by!'

"There is a 5 month slow down. You are still on the fastest route. You will arrive next year."

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

Titanic: How's my steering.

'Typical man - why can't he just ask for directions?'

Ishmael's First Day on the Pequod was Full of Surprises: "A harpoon!? Don't you practice catch and release?"

Saved...life is good!

Moustached gentleman

"Take your first left and then keep turning left until you eventually float to the top."

'Yes, I do a lot of rowing. How could you tell?'

Lost around a military base.

'That's hydroplaning for ya.'

Recalculating!

Dream On: Fish jumping into boat, whilst fisherman says 'Golly, guys! Can't you wait until I get my tackle box open?'

"I told you, if you're looking for a road map for your life, that's all you're gonna get."

"As night falls, You return to claim what isn't yours. . . come at me, sea devil!!!"