Nature Enthusiast Who Can't Stop Checking Stocks T-Shirts

'I get such a lonely feeling in the pit of my stomach out here, not knowing what my stocks are doing.'

The day the stock market went UP.

'There's good news and bad news, J. B. - we now control 51% of this corporation's stock!'

"We've called this special Stocholders meeting because we want all of our stock back."

'Now Featuring Gas-Fired Microwave Campfires!'

'For Harland, the only game in town is the bulls versus the bears...'

'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'

'They say a fool and his money are soon parted. Here's a list of fools. Make it happen.'

"You will be visited by three ghosts - the Ghost of Porfolios Past, The Ghost of Present Positions and the Ghost of Commodities Future."

'Just to let you know the cause of your pain and my advice is Quite Watching Stock Prices Go Up And Down.'

'Dad, I know all about the birds and the bees; explain stock-swaps and derivatives.'

"Your stork analyst is here, sir."

Bug hanging up stockings

Cheer up, you'll get your day.

"It's not enough being a cat anymore. I want to be a fat cat."

"Most of what I want this year is listed on the Nasdaq."

"Which way up do you want it?"

"Stocks edged lower on the news there's more to life than the accumulation of material things..."

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

Soup Company: Chicken Stock, Beef Stock and Laughing Stock,

'I today's market news, Greed roared back.'

"I told you everyone would come as a bull or a bear..."

'Stocks were high...then low...then suddenly high again on news of a new drug to treat mood swings...'

"A good quarter is a joy forever."

"I'm a real estate developer and I'm just looking over this area."

"Market euphoria is at an all time high."

Enter your pin into the bubble.

"Looks like the high tech shares have taken another fall."

'I'm sorry, Collin, but our Dreyfus Mid-Cap fund completely tanked, so we're going to have to let you go.'

"Who's on duty today...you or me?"

'In today's action, the Dow Jones Industrial Average cratered, then soared, then swooned, then skyrocketed, then plummeted, then rebounded, and finally threw up.'

'Eat a balanced diet, walk daily and make prudent investments.'

"Good God! Has the dollar fallen that far?"

'I actually look forward to hibernating during bull markets.'

'The market dropped on the news some IRS refund checks said 'do not cash until next Friday'.'